For example, if you don’t like sports, don’t tell a girl you like that you’re great at football just to impress her. Instead, look for interests that you actually share. There’s a better chance that she’ll be attracted to you if you truly have things in common. Additionally, authentic people are trustworthy. If people know they can trust you, they’re more likely to gravitate toward you. Be yourself, but don’t feel like you have to lay out all of your baggage when you’re just getting to know someone. Being honest doesn’t mean you need to confess your deepest secrets on the first date.
Instead of keeping your hands in your pockets or crossing your arms, make hand gestures when you speak to emphasize your points. Don’t strike poses or make gestures that make you uncomfortable. If you’re naturally shy, for instance, standing straight and tall can project a quiet confidence. Don’t feel like you have to make grand gestures as if you were performing onstage.
Look online for jokes or check out comedy routines. It’s wise to keep your material tame, especially if you’re just getting to know someone. Additionally, unless you have an established relationship and tease each other, don’t tell a joke at her expense.
When you’re talking to a woman, or anyone for that matter, ask questions to keep the conversation going. If they told you that they love music, ask about their favorite genres or bands instead of changing the subject.
Offer thoughtful compliments such as, “You made such a sharp point in class today,” “You’re a brilliant singer,” or “You have great taste in music. ” Comments about appearance are occasionally welcome, provided they’re respectful and balanced with compliments about personality. For instance, telling someone “You’re absolutely beautiful” or “That’s a really nice dress—I love your style!” can be sweet, but saying “Hey hottie, you’re looking good!” isn’t very nice.
Bear in mind giving someone space doesn’t mean you need to play hard to get or ignore them completely. You can be honest about your feelings without seeming needy or desperate for attention. For instance, if you want to ask your crush to hang out, say, “I’ve really wanted to try that new coffee place. Want to meet up there later today?” After a first or second date, it’s okay to say (or text) “I had a great time on our date!” However, you probably don’t want to send a 5-page text gushing about how you’re madly in love with her.
Good personal hygiene is more than just a basic part of looking your best. It shows that you take care of yourself, and being able to meet your needs is an attractive quality. Plus, you won’t attract many people if you look sloppy, smell, or pick your nose in public!
Like personal hygiene, making healthy lifestyle choices shows others that you care about being the best person you can be.
For instance, wearing a tucked-in button-up shirt and dress pants to a picnic where everyone is wearing shorts and sandals might feel uncomfortable. On the other hand, wearing a stained, wrinkled tee shirt and pajama bottoms when you’re out and about won’t attract many women.
Keep in mind too much cologne or perfume is just as unattractive as bad body odor. Less is more, especially if the scent you’re wearing is strong. Just apply 1 to 2 sprays to your neck and wrists. Additionally, keep mints or gum handy to keep your breath smelling fresh.
Women won’t find you attractive if you come off as conceited. On the other hand, if you’re constantly checking your appearance, you might seem insecure, which is not an irresistible quality.
Putting yourself down and constantly second-guessing yourself makes others feel uncomfortable. Learn to laugh at yourself, and don’t be afraid to look goofy or say the wrong thing. Remember that no one’s perfect, and everyone says something silly from time to time.
Optimism is an attractive quality, and women will be more likely to find you irresistible if hanging out with you is fun. It’s okay to vent to a loved one if something bad happens, but avoid laying all of your problems on someone you’re just getting to know. For instance, if you’re on a first date, don’t go on and on about how bad your day was or complain about everything that’s wrong with the world.
Remember that attraction isn’t a choice; it just happens. If someone doesn’t find you irresistible, that doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with you. That said, if someone expresses a negative opinion of you, it’s okay to think about how you can use that feedback to improve yourself. If, for example, someone says you talk a lot, work on listening and asking questions when you have conversations.
Come up with a list of personal, professional, and financial goals. Examples include taking up a new hobby, sticking to a fitness plan, earning a promotion, and buying a car or a house. Big long-term goals can feel overwhelming, so break them up into smaller steps. If, for instance, your goal is to buy a house, negotiate a raise at work, use the raise to save for a down payment, build credit, and take a financial literacy class for first-time homeowners.
